Sexless Marriage: Difference between revisions
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- Having sex (no more than) once a month</blockquote>Rollo Tomassi says:<blockquote>"Without sex, what is there? Sex is the glue that keeps a marriage together. Sex is the glue that keeps a relationship together. Sex is what defines a marriage between a man and woman." | - Having sex (no more than) once a month</blockquote>Rollo Tomassi says:<blockquote>"Without sex, what is there? Sex is the glue that keeps a marriage together. Sex is the glue that keeps a relationship together. Sex is what defines a marriage between a man and woman." | ||
"Without sex, what do you have? A roommate? Brother and sister? I can get by on my own with a maid, with laundry service. I can get the things I can get from a wife elsewhere. I can get sex from a prostitute, but without her '''genuine desire'''."</blockquote> | "Without sex, what do you have? A roommate? Brother and sister? I can get by on my own with a maid, with laundry service. I can get the things I can get from a wife elsewhere. I can get sex from a prostitute, but without her '''genuine desire'''."</blockquote> | ||
Revision as of 20:12, 10 May 2023
Definition
Two informal definitions:
A sexless marriage is one of the following
- Having sex less than 10 times per year
- Having sex (no more than) once a month
Rollo Tomassi says:
"Without sex, what is there? Sex is the glue that keeps a marriage together. Sex is the glue that keeps a relationship together. Sex is what defines a marriage between a man and woman."
"Without sex, what do you have? A roommate? Brother and sister? I can get by on my own with a maid, with laundry service. I can get the things I can get from a wife elsewhere. I can get sex from a prostitute, but without her genuine desire."
Culprits
The two main culprits cited as the main cause for a sexless marriage are age and marital dissatisfaction. Women mostly cited marital dissatisfaction.
Familiarity is anti-seductive. Comfort is anti-seductive. Routine is anti-seductive.
Men's sexuality is always on, women's sexuality is cyclic.
Statistics[1]
- 2-3x per week is 'normal'
- 20% of married people today haven't had sex (with each other) in the past year
- <4% married people ages 25-29 haven't had sex in the past year
- 8% married people ages 40-49 haven't had sex in the past year
- 22% married people ages 50-59 haven't had sex in the past year
- 38% married people ages 60-69 haven't had sex in the past year
- 54% married people ages 70+ haven't had sex in the past year
- Couples in which the man does 40% or more of the housework have significantly less sex than couples in which the woman does all the housework (see choreplay)
- Women over the age of 50 experience low sexual desire (likely menopause)
- When men get married, testosterone declines.
- When men get divorce, testosterone increases.
- Women who had their ovaries removed (hysterectomy) are twice as likely to experience low sexual desire than women who experience menopause naturally.
- 94% of couples think sex is integral to marriage and marital happiness.
- 26% of couples work to improve and maintain their sex lives
- ↑ The Rational Male - Red Pill 101 Ep. 5 - The Sexless Marriage - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EHoQNA6Ud0
Treatment
Though there is no formally accepted psychological methodology, here are some suggestions:
Bluepillprofessor has written a book on the topic: Saving a Low Sex Marriage - A Man's Guide to Dread, Seduction, and the Long Game which uses personal improvement and dread game to attempt to re-instantiate desire.
Rollo Tomassi suggests to mentally 'break up' with your wife. Focus on yourself: get to the gym, look better, feel better. See the Reconstruction posts one, two, three, four.